What sorcery is this?

I was thinking it would be fun to dress up in 18th century clothing and walk around acting really confused and looking at things like traffic lights and automobiles and such, and saying things like "HORSELESS CARRIAGES, WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!" But it was really early in the morning when I thought of this. It seemed less funny as I woke up more fully.

I was black last night

I had this bizarre dream where I was participating in a social experiment where I had like super extreme make-up to make me look like I was a small black woman. So in my dream, I woke up and went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror, and I shrieked! Because I had forgotten that I was a small black woman.

Rickroll Avenue

Oh, hi guys!

When I'm on the bus and the lady computer voice announces the stops, I frequently hear them wrong. And I mean ridiculously wrong. The other day, I thought I heard "Rickroll Avenue." I looked up at the sign and it read "Britwell Avenue." NICELY DONE, OWEN.

My house is currently empty. It makes me want to order awesome food and enjoy it ALL BY MYSELF. Because this is how I combat loneliness: food and porn. But never together, I think that's weird.

Darren was amazing last night. If you didn't see it, that's actually a real genuine tragedy. I got like seven boners in twenty seconds. Srsly.

My iPod is getting sad.

A few weeks ago I dropped my iPod Nano in a dirty puddle. It may have been this or numerous other drops or the accumulation of drops, but my iPod is getting worse every day. It no longer plays properly unless I apply specific pressure to the lower right corner of it. Depending on how I apply this pressure, it might:

1. Play properly
2. Cut out the left ear
3. Do this strange thing where all I hear is low thudding and bass, while midrange and high end is cut out
4. Not play at all

I thought it was my headphones at first, but it really isn't. :(