Deleted Scenes

I was just looking through my list of entries on this blog, and there is a surprising number of "drafts," where I just started writing and didn't end up publishing the entry. Here are some of them:

• January 18/09 - "Charles Horse," in which I describe a couple of really bad mornings when I woke up to my leg seizing up in pain (I still think the title is funny)
• January 24/09 - "I think I might have dreamt that I killed my mother."
• January 25/09 - "Breast Milk," in which I describe an incident where Dorian was laughing and barfing at the same time
• April 7/09 - I describe waiting TWO HOURS (literally) for a bus. If you know a bus is coming in two hours, it's ok, but waiting and not knowing where the fuck it is for two hours is infuriating. Especially if it's past midnight in St. Catharines and you are trying to get home to Scarborough.
  
• September 15/09 - "I don't have time to be upset about Patrick Swayze, I'm still dwelling on Heath Ledger. YEAH, I know it was almost two years ago, just let me deal with it. OK? GOD." STILL TRUE.
• January 15/10 - I describe an incident at work where one of my bosses, a Chinese gynecologist, needed me to help her test out her new colposcope, an instrument that kinda looks like a telescope that is for examining the vagina. I was asked to hold a cardboard tube up to the colposcope in order to vaguely simulate the vaginal opening. My other boss, an English gynecologist, walks in and sees what we are doing, and asks, "Oh, is Owen being the vagina?" with her English accent. "Owen is the vagina!"
• February 22/10 - "When I was little, I thought that Will Smith was saying 'In West Philadelphia, born IN RAGE' in the Fresh Prince theme song."

There's actually more, but this is all for now.